Insufferable Weight of Silence Page 2

  Wow, son! That's a nice truck you got there. My dad signs appreciatively. Dex beams at my dad's compliment and approval.

  Thanks. I bought it myself! He replies proudly. You want to drive it? He asks holding his keys out.

  No, I better not. I'd hate to mess it up. He replies wanton, not fooling anyone.

  It's just a truck Mr. Mason. Do your worst. Dex reassures pushing the keys out further.

  Alright, if you really don't mind an old cripple driving it. My dad grins taking them without a second thought. They're like a couple kids in a toy store.

  Dad turns to me and signs, go tell your mom I'll be right back but don't tell her I'm driving. Just say I went for a ride. I nod a bit disappointed that I don't get to go with them and not surprised in the least he doesn't want my overbearing mom to know what he's about to do.

  Dex opens the driver side door for my dad and gives him a hand in then points out a few things so he can get situated comfortably. When all is well he walks around the front stopping short and turns to me.

  "I'll let you drive later but you better not tell your mom or the twins I'm letting him do this. We can go do something and you can catch me up on everything I've missed." He offers with a wink.

  "Okay." I swallow hard feeling butterflies grow in my belly once more and watch him confidently saunter around the truck to climb in the passenger side with ease. It takes all that I have to gather myself and turn towards the house as to not lead on that I may actually be forming a crush on this guy I've known my whole life. My cheeks flush at the thought.

  I help my mom and Martha finish up in the kitchen by grabbing the shelled peas from their bowls and dump them into the pot on the stove for a soak, needing something to do with my hands, as well as take my mind off Dex.

  "Dad and Dex went for a ride in his new truck. They'll be back in a while." I call out as I put the empty bowl in the sink and walk towards the living room in search of Jason and Jeremy.

  "Oh, alright, Dear." My mom replies unaware of who's actually doing the riding and who's doing the driving.

  I find the twins sitting on the couch at opposite ends and plop down between them, resting my head on Jeremy's lap and my feet on Jason's. They ignore me as if I'm not even there both of them on their phones, so I do the only thing I know how to do, I annoy them. I wave my hand in Jeremy's face and stick my foot in Jason's.

  "Don't you guys ever put those things away? They could melt your brains you know. It's not like either of y'all have much to spare between the two to begin with." I tease. Jeremy moves his phone aside and looks down at me.

  "Wait until Dex finds out about Kaseton." He warns. I go wide eyed then narrow them pursing my lips at him.

  “You haven’t! You wouldn’t!” I outwardly panic eliciting devious grins from both of them.

  With a maniacal laugh Jason replies, "Oh no, we aren't stupid, Dex would kill us for letting it happen. Plus, we both want to be there when the truth finally comes out." I let out a heavy sigh and hang my head knowing it better come from me than anyone else. I already know he's going to be beyond angry.

  The rumble of his truck signals their return and I suddenly feel queasy.

  “I'm going to miss you, squirt.” Jeremy jests. They both jump up from the couch knocking me off onto the floor with a thud.

  "JERKS!" I shout in response to their cackles as they step over me and walk towards the door, leaving me on the floor. I look up to the doorway of the kitchen expecting mom or Martha to at least check on me but nothing. I push myself off the floor and dust off as Declan and my dad come in with the screen door slamming behind them. My dad bearing a huge grin from driving for the first time in ages.

  You better wipe that grin off your face or mom is going to know what you were up to.

  Dex comes up behind me and places his arms on my shoulders resting his chin on the top of my head. It makes me feel warm and fuzzy inside, I don't know about these new found feeling towards him.

  "What are y'all kiddos up to today?" My mom asks. I crane my neck back to look up at Dex since I haven't a clue. He gives me a kind smile.

  "If you and Mr. Mason don't mind I was thinking about taking Amity out to the Harris house. They're having a bonfire and I wanted to see some friends I hadn't seen in a while." Dex asks sweetly, laying it on thick, as if they didn't already love him.

  "Oh sure, Dear. She's been moping about the house ever since you left, quite pathetic actually." My mom replies and turns back to her conversation with Martha. I glare at the back of her head in disbelief.

  "Thanks mom." I reply abashed at her for outing me.

  "Ready to go, Amity?" He asks.

  "Right now, it's not even noon?”

  “Yea, right now. They need help setting up and gathering supplies.” He chuckles.

  “Uh, yea, I guess.... Where did Jeremy and Jason go?"

  "They're meeting us there later. They wanted to go home and change first and Jason had some errands to run." He answers. "Which reminds me, I need a shower and I have to go by the auto parts store. So you're going to have to hang out at my place until I'm done showering and tag along, unless you want me to come back and pick you up later."

  "No it's fine. I'm ready now. You think I need to change into something warmer incase it gets cold tonight?" He looks me over and points to my shorts.

  "Yea. You think you found some short enough?"

  "They are not that bad!" I exclaim.

  "Yea, sure. It's like you want me to get in a fight." He jokes pushing me by the shoulders towards the door and out onto the creaky old porch. I turn and look at him questioningly not sure if it really was a joke or not then blush at the fact that he had previously checked me out.

  "Your ass is hanging out." He repeats. I shoot him a glare after making sure it wasn't.

  "It is not! My boyfriend doesn't mind anyway so why should you? These are his favorite shorts on me." I think his face falters slightly but he quickly corrects it so I'm unsure.

  "Then you really do need to go change.” He turns me back towards the door. “..and who the hell is your boyfriend?" He growls protectively.

  "I'm not changing." I say dodging his grip and walk to the passenger side of his truck. He glares angrily at me, for what, I'm unsure before making his way off the porch and grumbles something inaudible.

  “Um, Dex? I don't think I can get in without help.” I inform him noticing that the bottom of the truck door is just over my waist. It's what I get for being vertically challenged in the height department. Even with the nerf bar at my hips I don't think I'll be able to manage without his help.

  He laughs loudly forgetting our small disagreement, as he walks around the front to the passenger side. He effortlessly reaches the handle and opens the door. I grip the seat and pull myself up as he picks me up by the waist and pushes me in.

  "Your shorts aren't short my ass. I've just seen more of you than I'd like to have. Who's your boyfriend?" He points out and asks again obviously not about to let it go. I take a mental note to never wear shorts, a dress, or a skirt when I ride in his truck, finally becoming aware of my outfit.

  I get situated in the passenger seat and wait for him to jump in before I answer him. It's probably best to get it over with without an audience. More specifically the bozo twins.

  "Kaseton. He's not my boyfriend, though. He hasn't DTR'd the relationship." I mumble bracing myself for what's coming knowing it won't be good.

  "WHAT? Do your parents know? Ha!” He laughs angrily. “I bet not or it would have never happened. What are you thinking?" He shouts gripping his steering wheel tightly.

  "You don't worry about what I do." I tell him, not having a case to plead because he's right. No matter how you look at, it Kase isn't right for me.

  "Since when and why have neither of you told me?"

  "Who I date is not your business! I'm not talking to you about this." I say sternly. He sits in his own brooding silence, I can see the gears turning, he isn't happy at all. Neither of us to
ld him about it because we both knew the reaction that we would get. Kaseton wanted it a secret more so than I did. I don't like keeping things from Dex but they're good friends and we both knew he wouldn't be as forgiving with Kaseton as he would me.

  I watch his jaw tick back and forth reeling in anger for several minutes. I have half the heart to just tell him it's only been two lousy dates in the last couple weeks. Well that and lots of late night phone calls but I can omit that part.

  "I can't fucking believe him." He grumbles betrayed.

  That was all it took for me to not say a word.

  I patiently wait around for him to finish showering, he's been in there for what seems like an hour. He hasn't said anything to me since I told him about Kaseton, so maybe he needs time to cool down, I hope he gets over it soon.

  When he finally comes in the room I'm laying on my back with my feet propped up on his wall and my ankles crossed, picking at fuzz on his pillowcase. My eyes find the only poster of a half naked girl that he has hanging on the wall.

  "That's disgusting!" I repulse. His eyes follow mine to the poster.

  "That is far from disgusting." He practically drools. I redirect my eyes from the poster to where I find him fumbling with something behind me at his dresser. I hang my head off the side looking upside down at him.

  "God Dex! Put on some clothes." I bellow.

  "Shut up, I'm trying to find an undershirt and I'm still not happy about the whole Kaseton thing. It's not a good idea, Amity, he's too old for you." He warns and throws the towel he had around his neck at me. I fight with it until I get it under control and chunk it on the floor. Catching scent of it before it left my hands, smelling of men's body wash and shampoo, it makes my mouth water. Something about it was alluring.

  "Don't throw the other towel. I may vomit if you do and stop worrying about Kaseton. I said it was only two dates!" I tell him annoyed that he won't let it go.

  "You mean tackle me and have your way with me because we both know you don't really like Kase." He grins. I huff out an uncomfortable laugh at his comment finding it odd that the day I think I actually might believe I started developing a crush on Dex he says something like that.

  "I don't think so. I'm partial to my virtue, thank you very much." I say like it's no big deal and for the sake of Dex's sanity.

  My virginity is something I've always taken pride in since all our friends are horn dogs. Then again all of my friends are older guys and are rather protective of me. It's hard finding a boyfriend they all agree on or even getting alone with one long enough to do anything. I'm pretty fuzzy on all this relationship business, thanks to these bodyguards.

  "Good to know. Now close your eyes." He demands turning around. I throw my hands over my face and do as he tells me. After a few seconds I find myself curiously wondering what he would look like nude and completely forgetting about Kaseton all together. I lean my head back off the bed again and peak at him through my fingers to get a better view of his lower back, butt, and thighs. Then quickly cover my eyes back up when I had.

  "Nice butt." I utter.

  "Dammit Amity, you're insufferable." He bellows annoyed and hurriedly pulls his boxers up.

  "Just because I've still got my v-card doesn't mean I don't like to look and it's not like I haven't seen your butt before." I chuckle pointing out the fact. When we were little our parents use to bathe us together and put us in the same bed to sleep when they stayed up late.

  I flop over on my belly and rest my chin in my hands, to find him buttoning his pants. His shirtless body is pretty amazing, I'll give him that. So was his naked body. Since he's started at the fire academy he's becoming more fit and muscular. He didn't even look bad to begin with but now.... He catches me eyeing his thick arms hungrily while he puts on his socks. Arms, are my guilty pleasure. There's something about them that makes me weak in the knees and thoughtless.

  "What?"

  "Nothing, just admiring your new and improved body." I pretend to jest, but in all truth, I sure as heck was. He chunks his undershirt at me hitting me square in the face. I jump up on his bed holding it high above my head and dangle it back and forth with a come-and-get-it grin.

  "You just made a huge mistake."

  He prowls over to me and grips my waist pulling me forward and over his shoulder. I let out a loud squeak and marvel in the fact that it's too easy for him to throw me around. He effortlessly snatches the shirt from my hand while I try to fight him and gawk at his rippling back muscles. It's a losing battle, he's way too large and is literally holding me still with just one arm. He's so strong, he literally has a death grip on me without actually hurting me. He starts laughing and throws me onto his bed. I let out a loud huff and catch myself before I roll off the edge with my legs flailing in the air.

  "Jerk!"

  Before I know it he's leaning over me shirtless and sexy in all his muscular glory. He smells amazingly clean which makes my mouth water so much I have to swallow. He places both hands on either side of my head and slowly moves closer to my face. My mind goes blank, disbelieving because he's just so close.

  "I'll show you a jerk." He utters lowering his voice an octave. My eyes lower to his perfect lips where his seductive words just escaped. The thought of kissing him, kissing anyone is suddenly on my mind. If I thought, I was in trouble before it was nothing compared to now.

  "I've never kissed anyone before." I confide in him quietly. This was a secret I had actually managed to keep to myself more so out of embarrassment. I don't know what made me say it, especially to him.

  He arches an eyebrow at me.

  "Never?" He asks taken aback. My heart begins to pound in my chest because I suddenly wish he would be my first.

  "Never." I whisper looking from his mouth to his beautiful honey colored eyes.

  "Aren't you with Kaseton?" He asks staring down at my mouth when I bite my bottom lip. It's a rhetorical question but I feel the need to answer and justify what I really want. Kaseton has a reputation that makes my being a virgin, in every aspect of the term, hard to believe.

  "We've been on two dates. That hardly constitutes as anything but just that, two dates, and I don't kiss on the first date or the second for that matter." I inform him.

  "You mean you don't kiss people you don't like. Not to mention I could get in trouble just as much as him."

  "I'm a risk taker and a trouble maker." I whisper. The yearning is eating at me twisting my insides. It's insurmountable how bad I want his lips on mine in this moment. I find myself wishing I hadn't gone on those dates at all.

  "I don't want to do that to him. He's my best friend, Amity, and I can loose everything I've worked so hard for these last three years." He replies but I can see the hunger in his eyes, he wants it as much as I do.

  "It doesn't have to mean anything." I mutter hurt. He's mentally fighting himself about whether it's worth the risk, I can see it in his eyes. "Plus, I thought I was your best friend...." I lie trying to convince him and myself it would ok.

  He doesn't need anymore convincing than that as he leans forward closer to me and carefully presses his mouth to mine. I slowly part my lips, he follows suit pushing his tongue into my mouth. His minty sweet breath forces me to quietly moan. His soft lips roughly roaming mine sends my stomach into a frenzy. We explore the other in a far too intimate manner for being just friends, I know it and he knows it.

  When he pulls back he kisses my swollen lips hard one more time quickly and grins as if accomplishing something. Or did he feel rebellious because we broke some sort of unspoken dating/friend code/age restriction. All I know is now I'm addicted and want more.

  "How was that for a first kiss?" He asks breathless, as affected as I am.

  "I don't have anything else to compare it to." I reply still dazed by how great it was. I place my hand at the back of his head scared he's going to move away and pull him to me for another long kiss.

  Tasting his lips and delicious breath reveling in how perfect he tastes on my tongue
. I feel him form a smile as he slowly pulls away. When I thought it would be awkward I was certainly wrong. It was anything but, it was safe and right. I want to reach up and touch my lips but I don't want to wipe him from them so I settle for licking my lower lip and drawing it out between my teeth. He catches me and worry washes across his face or so I think that's what it was.

  "Kaseton is going to kill me." He whispers suddenly realizing the seriousness in what we've just done. Just like that the moment is over.

  "I don't care." I shrug. He let's out a laugh. "Well I do if he kills you but... I mean….I don't care what he thinks. I think he was the mistake." I admit truthfully.

  "We're going to be late." He says still leaning over me, possibly thinking about doing it again. I know I am.

  "So." I say looking at his puffy freshly kissed lips. "Wanna make out instead?" I tease. He rolls his eyes and shakes his head smiling.

  "Get up and get your ass in my truck." He commands playfully, back to his normal self.

  "Declan." I utter wanting to know what he’s thinking but just like that the moment is over. He stands pulling on his clean white tee and a long sleeved dress shirt.

  "It was just a kiss, Amity." He replies not looking at me. It wounds my ego. Maybe for him it was just a kiss but it was my first kiss and not a good idea for me to egg him on. I should have known better.

  "Can I drive to the parts store?" I ask quietly conflicted. He pulls his keys off the top of his dresser and tosses them in my direction without looking. The fact that he can't face me wounds me deeper. I crawl off his bed and get to my feet, finding myself standing far to closely and catch myself eyeing his mouth again unintentionally.

  "You said it didn't have to mean anything." He steely repeats my words from earlier, catching my wanton desire.

  "I lied." I admit as I walk past him into the hallway. It solidified my feelings for him. "I didn't force you to kiss me."

  "Stop, Amity, I can't do this to him." He replies sternly. My pride rips to shreds as each word pours from his mouth. He doesn't like me back. I had been reading too much into all his actions.